Relationships we form with others can either make us or break us, unfortunately for me I was unlucky enough to experience the latter. For most of us who start our first somewhat romantic relationship have an expectation in our minds that film and television have painted for us. Although, what we see portrayed on a screen is a far cry from reality. As the months have flown I have been stuck connected to a person who can’t seem to decide whether they want me as a part of their life or not. It hurts everyday, and even though it hurts me I stupidly allow myself to feel this way, and that is what has sparked the inner conflict within myself that has forced me to sit down and examine who I am as a person and reflect on the decisions I have made that have brought me to this point in my life. For months now he has started university and has vanished from my everyday school life, however even though we are physically apart I feel as though I am a puppet and he is the puppet master controlling my every move. I find it so unbelievably difficult to understand how one person can hold so much influence over one’s life. Once he finished school last year with his 90.00 Atar score i thought my problems were over, clearly I was wrong. As time has passed I have realized that it is worse to have someone half way rather than not have them in your life at all. I have sat down with a number of friends who have tried to help me fight this demon inside myself and let go, although i just can’t seem to let go of most would call a ‘toxic relationship’. Conflict in our lives can force us to suppress our feelings in hope that the problem at hand will somehow magically disappear. Although, by doing so the conflict never vanishes, if it all it becomes much more prominent in our lives. However, there are times where we must make a decision, and that is, whether to continue to live in misery and darkness or attempt to make a positive change and eliminate all the venomous individuals who stand in the way of our happiness. It is no doubt going to be difficult, one hurdle could possibly be that life could somehow become ironic, in the sense that, as we have now embarked on this quest to find happiness within ourselves, the people who we want to exit our lives, suddenly realize this and give you every excuse in the world as to why they want to stay in your life. Temptation is an easy trap one can fall into, however if your intentions to combat your inner conflict are pure, you will find the strength to fight through. Daniel Rooke, the protagonist in the historical novel, The Lieutenant, experiences his own inner conflict, as he forms a close bond with Aboriginal girl,
Targaran, however as the tensions between the settlers and Aboriginal people increase,
Rooke realizes that he cannot continue to enjoy his secluded and indulgent lifestyle. This turn of events forces him to choose between two worlds he feels loyal to. Rooke is forced to investigate who he really is and what he desires instead of thinking of the logical answer. In the end Rooke decides that he does not want to be