Why Are We Attracted?
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Why Are We Attracted? Reading the Chapter on attraction, I wondered how many of those who befriended someone or fell in love with, asked why they did. In fact some of them said that it just happened. Now, at least I have enlightened myself about ‘why’ of it. The first reason is proximity or ‘being near’. Living in neighborhood, working in the same office, traveling on the same route by the same bus or train or studying in the same class of institution are some examples of proximity. Three factors; namely, proximity, physical attractiveness and similarity in appearance and behavior are causative to attraction. We like people who live closer to us. It is a fact that the increased frequency of meeting people makes us to observe them closely and to understand them better. Proximity provides opportunities to meet and interact frequently. We generally like to live near people who are similar to our economic, social backgrounds. This proximity gives us feelings of mutual trust; understanding and unity. ‘Beauty’- the weapon of Cupid- is perhaps the most influencing factor responsible and ‘accountable’ for attraction. It works like magnet or ‘charm. Physical attraction brings people of opposite sex closer. No one can escape the magic of ‘beauty’ which is sometimes capable of driving someone mad. Now I don’t wonder when I see ‘swarm’ of boys around a beautiful girl and girls ‘humming’ around a handsome boy. Beauty makes a person noticeable and enhances proximity. Physical attraction is the stepping stone for building further relationship. In fact, one endowed with beauty becomes the centre of attraction. We know about the ‘face that launched thousand ships’. Other contributory factor is similarity in appearance and behavior. I know now why I always look at faces of people before I start to talk with them. Faces are expressive of unseen traits of people. Long association of husband and wife makes them look alike. Similarity in behavior brings together people of similar tastes, likes and dislikes. We are attracted to people who match our norms of behavior. It is just the opposite of magnetic attraction. Human attraction is based on the principle of ‘like attracts like’. This is why we join particular interest groups. People with like or similar behavior blend homogenously. I have noticed that in a group of friends, the one who differs in tastes or traits is left out and avoided. Similarity is responsible