I have a team of mixed background, highly experienced team with different level of motivation and drive towards high performance. Every day I used to trial different techniques to get the best out of them with not much luck. I was constantly worrying that my lack of experience in managing a big team could soon be exposed. To cover it up, I used to do some crazy hours in an attempt to be on top of everything. However deep in my mind, I was waiting for the perfect opportunity to jump out of this sinking ship and get on to doing something else that would not expose my weakness so badly.
Journey since First Test up to now
Fire (40% - 70%):
I have since realized before I could change the world, the change should start from within myself. I have changed my perspective from fear and anxiety of failing to create a high performing team to my transformation journey of being an effective leader producing great results. Before I used to fidget whenever I was in a difficult conversation, whereas now I feel I am fully equipped with strategies to face challenges and adopt to situations using the techniques I learnt in the course.
Snowball (10% - 45%):
I have started realizing that good intents are just not enough to make a positive impact on my team. I have learnt the importance of providing context of deliverables which I used to take for granted thinking team members would generally know why the task is required and how it contributes to the team’s objectives. For the first time ever, in my performance objectives session with my manager, I was courageous enough to discuss the recruitment mistakes I made and I was openly able to admit to him that I have learnt from these mistakes. My attempts of raising the bar of team performance failed miserably because I didn’t know I ever had to be clear about standards and values. In fact, I didn’t quite understand the difference between values and standards myself. Now that I know the difference, I use these in my team meetings consciously by slowly introducing a standard in each team meeting. I should admit I still struggle with the challenge in getting my team members to live up to the standards agreed therefore this will be an area I will add to my development plan.
Master Chef (0% - 40%):
Post attending the workshops, I feel quite overwhelmed with the toolset I have acquired. I still am in an excitement mode by testing out different techniques learnt in the course. I have tools of trade but I haven’t mastered how best to mix them in the right proportion to get the desired outcomes. I have identified the gap between the leader I aspire to be and the actual leader I am; similarly I understand the difference between the ideal impact I would want to have over my team and my actual impacts. However I have not been serious enough to come up with a plan. What I have started doing though is to consciously review my effectiveness as a leader and as a mother every day. This has led to bring about some personal discipline in my life, but I have a long way to go to come up with a plan. I hope once I get out of the excitement phase of my new learnings, I will be able to put various techniques together in a cohesive manner and thus firming up my plan of action.
Coach (20% - 25%):
I have started reaching out to my mentor at work however as he doesn’t work with me on a day to day basis, it’s hard for him to provide direct feedback. I am still reluctant to have my direct reports as my peer coaches; I am concerned it may compromise my position as a manager. With my peers I am struggling to have that partnership who can be my coach as I am afraid that they may use this against me and damage my reputation propagating I still am