Leslie Gonzales
Robin Billington
English 102
2 March 2015

Dead Body Disposal Just in case you happened to end up with a dead body to dispose of there are many ways
There are some basic methods you may use, although some of these methods may seem basic or of common sense, I have found that the hilarity in some of the following methods are difficult in some ways yet have an overall basis of humour or entertainment. Methods of properly concealing the body or hiding it, burning the body or the use of fire, dissection of a corpse and creativity have all been previously used to discard of a corpse. One of the more common steps in the disposal of a corpse is to hide or to conceal the corpse. You may first experiment with backyard burial. This requires a backyard with limited access by individuals other than yourself. The basic tools are required for this method are a shovel, which almost everyone already has. If you do not they are easily attainable at any hardware store. Simply dig a hole a few feet deep, throw the corpse inside and recover with dirt…easy. A more difficult way to conceal is the ever so repetitive basement burial, seen in many horror movies and crime oriented television shows. Again another hole is needed but this time the floor will be concealed with cement to smooth out the floor surface for and even look that does not draw attention the way that a large area of dirt may bring.
Concealing the body is crucial so that you are in no way implicated. I’m sure there is a place in your town that serves as a n animal cemetery, if not your may need to find a dead animal, or if you’re that desperate just go kill one for yourself. Dig a hole, pretty simple, add the human remains, add some dirt to cover the body, add the remains of the deceased animal, then once again cover with dirt. Not all concealment consists of burial but this last one I just had to include if this is the route you chose to take. To conceal means to hide and what better way to hide something than in plain sight. The practice of taxidermy does just that.
How interesting. If you have ever had to clean out an animal in order to eat it or stuff it, I’m sure this task can be done the same with humans. Remove the remains and bones and basically everything inside while leaving the skin as intact as possible….then stuff it like you’re stuffing a turkey. It is now on display for everyone to see. Creepy, yes but all the same some human remains hidden in plain sight. Make up whatever story you want to explain but most people won’t ask you a thing, just give you a crazy look and keep to themselves out of fear of enduring the same fate. Fire is always an option. It removes almost all evidence of human remains, except for the bones and teeth of course, so you may want to remove the teeth to keep any remains that may be found by animals or other humans unidentifiable. The basic method of fire is to simply burn the body, Chose your method of staring the fire whether it be gasoline or some other solvent, or just set it on fire without any. Placement can be anywhere, a fire in the woods, under a bridge in a trash can, or in a fire pit in the back yard, even cremation preformed solely by you instead of a crematorium. Explosives are amazing!!! Not only are you taking part in a fiery explosion but you get to watch the deceased separate into a large amount of little pieces. As with all explosions you can’t be fully aware of where all the little pieces may land or what direction they are thrown. This makes it very simple to keep yourself out of the loop and finding all the parts extremely difficult and Ta Dah!! No more body. You say fire and people think flames, so lets take this in another way…A chemical burn…not exactly fire, but burning just the same.
Commonly refer to an acid wash this process simply disposes of ALL remains down to the teeth and the bones. You simply need a large barrel able to withstand the chemical